Tuesday, 7 March 2017

Crusade's End is Literally the Widest Book



Look at the size of the book in the photograph above. It's the widest book I own. It might not be the largest volumetrically, but it's the widest. Crusade's End is an omnibus containing three novels and three short stories from the Horus Heresy series of Black Library books set 10,000 years before the events of Warhammer 40-goddamn-000.

Are you following me?


It's a wide book, man. The widest. It's wider than my Michael Moorcock Jerry Cornelius omnibus. It's wider than than Tom Clancy's Rainbow Six (not to be confused with Tom Clancy's Rainbow Six). It's wider than the P. G. Woodhouse Jeeves and Wooster Omnibus we have here. I mean, it's even wider than Neil Gaiman's American Gods. Holy shit.

It contains The Wolf of Ash and Fire and Death of a Silversmith by Graham McNeill, Horus Rising by Dan Abnett, False Gods by Graham McNeill again, Galaxy in Flames by Ben Counter, and Lord of the Red Sands by Aaron Dembski-Bowden. And it's wider than Neal Stephenson's Quicksilver.

Wider than Quicksilver!

In summary, Crusade's End is literally the widest book known to man, a marvel of human ingenuity and engineering that eclipses any and all of humanity's greatest achieve—

What's that? It's not as wide as Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix?

Fuck.

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